Crabby Cake

Just the way I see things…

Posts Tagged ‘family

Happy Father’s Day, dad!

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Oh hai. Geez, I need to post more…


Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there! My dad is pretty kick ass, but in a totally different way than my mom….

Blah  blah, years ago I went to therapy… It was a fucked up point in my life and I really don’t know if therapy did much but question EVERYTHING a bit more. But, thank god I had a $20 co-pay. The question came up about my parents and their relationship… Um, my folks have been happily married(?) since 1975.

The part I realize as an adult is, my dad busted his balls as much as he possibly could saying yes and no to multiple people so his young wife could be there to raise his  2 small children for almost 10 years.

My dad has been delivering your daily bread for about 35 years, in the Seattle area for about 28 years and before that San Fransisco. My dad has been getting up around 1am for as long as I can remember. Growing up, I remember eating dinner at 5pm and my dad going to bed around 7pm, if not earlier. On his Sundays off, he would wake us up at 7am with fresh hot pancakes! To my dad, sleeping in was 4:20am. Even going on vacation with him as an adult, sleeping in is over at 7am! Get up! Did I mention my dad still gets up early and is 60?

As an adult, even without the want of children, I have realized that my dad has done so much for me and my family.  I am with a wonderful person, Kevin, who I realize has a father that thought more about himself than his wonderful family of five.  Kevin has the most wonderful mother that I feel the need to wish her happy father’s day as well!

Dad, I know you might never see this but I want to say thank you! Thank you for that moment many many years ago when you told me you were my dad and also my friend and shared your teddy bear Sugar with me and told me I could also share anything with you that I ever needed with you.  Thank you so very much for telling me that my ex fiance was an asshole when it mattered most! Thank you for watching cartoons! Thank you for letting me, and whom ever I’ve been with, use your time share in Canada. Thank you for co-signing student loans! Thank you for paying for community college, even when I dropped out! Thank you for co-signing on student loans! Thank you for refinancing my car when I had someone else’s eviction on my credit report. Thannl you for offering to go with me to buy tires this week, even though I’m almost 33 and have bought them a few times in the past. Thank you for giving me the love of Mexican food. Thank you for being the normal one in your family! Thank you for your work ethic! Thank you for deciding to move to Seattle! Thank you for doing a hard ass job all these years! Thnak you for letting me be me! Thank you for balancing me.

I love my dad! I realize at my ripe age of almost 33 that the calmness and going with the flow bit all comes from my dad. As does my depression, varicose veins, eye lashes, thick hair that has recently gone curly, ADD tendencies,  and crazy love of chips and salsa… Sadly, my pops is out of town until the 23rd…But, I am happy that he is on vacation! Have fun in Glacier!

I love you, pops! Thank you so much for all that you have done, and still do for me!

P.S. Stop sending me text messages of the cat!

Written by crabbycake

June 19, 2011 at 12:33 am

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Yay mom…

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Whoa dudes…

What’s new? Nothing, really.

Or it was really gross and cold earlier in the week and today it was amazingly beautiful with highs in the 60s.

Or I bought a big ass purse.

Or I joined Weight Watchers again. Ugh. So I have a love hate relationship with this program. Or, maybe I needed a huge break in order to figure out what was wrong with my guts. But, the truth is Weight Watchers works for me… just like my mom swears that South Beach is the greatest thing on the plant and helped her lose 30 pounds and she’s stayed within that 30 pounds range give or take 5 pounds for something like 5+ years.

Speaking of moms… so I have a weird relationship with my mom and its been that way for years, like maybe 27 of them. I love my mom… because she is my mom. When I was a kidlet my mom didn’t work so she could raise my brother and I. She was totally hands on. When I was 9 or so she got a job working in the school district, this drove me nuts and still sort of does. She does some pretty neat stuff for hobbies. We don’t always  see eye to eye and we have very different out looks on life. My mom seems to be pretty happy and such and tries very hard to understand my depression. I think my mom had finally gotten to the point where she is okay that I don’t want to have children. My mom is only 21 years older than I am. My mom is my mom and that’s really all there is to it…. I love you mom, and thank you for listening to me and trying the best you can, to understand me.

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May 8, 2010 at 10:31 pm

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Gluten dreams and family that just doesn’t get it.

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I had a dream last night that I ate gluten. I was at someone’s house and ate cornbread. I realized after a few bites that it was probably full of extra flours. I remember asking if it had flour in it and they said yes, but it was organic. I started to panic and get very upset. … then I woke up.

Years ago when I took soy out of my diet, it was really hard to explain it to friends and family. Especially family. Going to a brunch where there would be “tons of things for me to eat!” and only being able to eat fruit. While I know people have great intentions and really try to accommodate my food issues and intolerance, it would be helpful to get the right one. My aunt thought I was lactose intolerant so she bought me rice milk? She also pointed out to me that it was organic.

This is going to be the hardest one to explain to people. I mean really. I work in a store where people tell me they don’t want wheat flour, they want white flour. Really, what kind of grain is white flour from then? White is a color, not a grain I’ve ever heard of. I told my dad about eating gluten free, he delivers bread for a living and has for more than 30 years and he told me I should try this one they carry that is made with flax.

But I think the real problem is that most Americans, including 99.9% of my family, has no idea what their foods look like in raw form. They now know that organic is better for you… There are tons of things that I know about foods, and there are tons of things I don’t know about foods. I’m learning everyday. I wish I could encourage people to think more about their food, but it has to be their choice and not forced upon them.

I wish I had been born with all of these food intolerance and known about being gluten intolerant/or with Celiac disease earlier in life. People who have known me my whole life, mainly family, know I could eat whatever I wanted but now don’t understand why I can’t as a 30+ adult. I’m old enough to know my body and know when something isn’t right.

Written by crabbycake

March 15, 2010 at 10:00 am

I object!

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I’m going to a wedding this afternoon. Kevin’s brother is getting hitched.

This will be the first time I will attend a wedding that sounds like a bad idea.

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December 5, 2009 at 11:34 am

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I <3 my few gray hairs.

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I’ve decided that my mom worries about my gray hairs more than I do. She seems to bring them up whenever I see her.

I have a feeling she frets over them so much because it reminds her that I’m the one that is going to be 31 and shes 52.

I honestly don’t care to dye them because I couldn’t be bothered with the upkeep of dying my hair.

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June 16, 2009 at 9:35 pm

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Not cool, Cali.

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California… what’s the deal?

Gays can’t get married in your lines? But if they were to get married in that short time slot that was allowed, their marriage is still legit? I don’t understand why this is still an on going battle.

Hmm. All are created equal my ass.

Written by crabbycake

May 26, 2009 at 3:48 pm

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I don’t want children.

When I was younger I wanted kids. My ex and I used to talk about having kids. I wanted to be a school teacher at one point in my life.

But then I realized, I don’t find joy and happiness in children.

I don’t ooh and aah or coo and goo at babies.

Its great that you are holding your child, but please continue to hold her because I have no desire to.

I finally feel like most of my depression is so far behind me. Why would I want to have a child and increase my chance of bringing more depression into my life? So many people I know have told me about their postpartum depression, I know I’d be a perfect candidate for it. My mom finally gets this, she sees it as a very valid reason. I’m also choosing to end my depression with me, I don’t want to have a child deal with it the way I have.

I hate getting up early for work. I know I would hate getting up early to tend to a child.

I don’t like things that are sticky.

I have debt to pay off still. There is no extra money for a child because I am comfortable the way I am.

So many people don’t understand all of this. It is perfectly okay, I promise you. If you don’t understand my not wanting, I don’t understand the yearning for one or even more than one.

Written by crabbycake

February 18, 2009 at 9:29 pm

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Happy belated!

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You know you are a total douche when you realize it is the 6th and your mom’s birthday was on the 5th.
You realized that you talked to her but totally spaced it. You call and say “yeah and I was gonna say happy birthday but apparently it was missed in all those things we talked about. Um, yeah. I knew I was forgetting something but couldn’t remember what. …”
At least I beat my brother at remembering… a day late.
Happy Birthday mom, you’re neat.

Written by crabbycake

February 6, 2009 at 7:26 pm

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Moms know best, mostly.

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Oh mom.
I love you, sometimes more than others. I understand to you really don’t understand depression and you lending a listening ear is the best you can do.
But, you do seem to understand sleep and what a huge effect the lack of sleep has on people. Thank you for your tips, I already knew all of them. And thank you for the $9 to go buy Tylenol PM. While it totally isn’t up my alley to take stuff such as this, I really do thank you for being supportive. I bought it and I’ll try it just this once. Your idea of taking Benadryl was a total flop leaving me hung over, maybe this time will be better.

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January 19, 2009 at 9:03 pm

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November is almost over?! WTF?

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I love ending vacation with a cold. Who doesn’t? I gonna sit here with my Umcka cold sipping stuff and some Breath Deep tea. Um, I guess if I am fighting a cold I should be smart and put on socks.

Whistler was nice, as usual. My parents were my parents, as usual…. Going down the water slide in the family pool was more fun than I would have imagined. It snowed 2 days after we left and rained the whole time we were there. I like Canada. I wish I could take a week off every month.

Kevin’s sister and her husband are coming up this weekend. Her husband is going to help Kevin wire the whole house for cable and internets. Hopefully his sister and I can get a chance to go out and do some girly stuff like go window shopping. I’d be happy just to get out and drool over stores full of Christmas decorations.

I have 78 podcasts to listen to, I best get started on them!!

That Burt’s Bees lip balm than managed to get washed and dried… yeah it also managed not to ruin all of my clothes it was washed with!!! Score, we can’t afford to replace much of anything right about now.

Written by crabbycake

November 14, 2008 at 11:18 am

Diamonds are forever.

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I went to visit my grandma today.

She gave me a pair of diamond earrings. They are earrings she had made about 15 years ago from a diamond ring that had belonged to her aunt. There were 6 stones. She and my aunt had earrings, my mom took her stones and put them into a newer wedding ring. She had her ears pierced at the age of 60 so she could wear diamonds! But, she never really wore them.

Today, I got them.

Thank you grandma, I love you.

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September 19, 2008 at 12:48 am

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Happy Friday!

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Watermelon juice? Years ago when I worked in a juice bar the summer was always fun, fruit flies by the platoons! But we used to make random fruit concoctions including stuff with watermelon. Today I got a free Evolution Watermelon juice. Let me tell you, it’s like summer in a container! And minus the seeds! And there was no extra crap in it, just juice! Um, but the price is a bit higher than you might pay for an Odwalla, but after hearing about this company, it might be worth it on those days I feel like blowing $4 on a juice.

Today was fantastically started by waking up at 5:30 only to realize I was supposed to have been at work a half hour prior… reseting the alarm time and setting the alarm are two different things.

I order this shirt from The Herbivore Clothing Co. I am not a vegetarian any more, but I really care about food and the way it is grown and processed and where it comes from. I was also stoked because I was able to order a large.

My mom took me shopping yesterday because she understands the whole “I’ve lost weight, and now I want to wear clothes that are closer to my size, even though I’m not done losing weight yet.” thing. Thanks mom, I love you. She lost 30lbs doing the South Beach Diet (um, she read the book, there was no online program when she did it) and has kept it off for something like 2 years. She looks great, I’m proud of her. She’s proud of me. But, when she was losing weight she had extra cash to spend on clothes and bought a whole new wardrobe. I’m excited because I can wear stuff from Ann Taylor Loft again without feeling like I’m squishing into everything, some thing yes, I squish… most things, no squish, but not always flattering. She bought me jeans that were $20 that I fit into. Even if I can only wear them for 2 months or something, $20.

I have a dinner date with an old friend from my OSU days in a week. Yay!

Summer has arrived in Seattle, thank god! 90 degrees tomorrow?!

Written by crabbycake

June 28, 2008 at 1:59 am